Happy Morales Dies Unexpectedly

Seven's Satire Report News
Laredo, Texas
Laredo resident Juan ‘Happy” Morales, the man who grew famous for always saying “Hello” died yesterday unexpectedly.
Happy Morales became a legendary celebrity in Laredo over the years because of his famous phrase “Hello, How Are You?”
According to family friend Jorge Cuervo he could not remember even one single time in his life that when he saw Happy, that Happy didn’t smile and say “Hello”.
“Later in his life, when he had begun to lose his memory he would greet me with ‘Hello. How Are You?’ at least 3 or 4 times every morning. That’s just the kind of guy Juan was. We are going to miss him terribly”, said Jorge.

Those familiar with the legend of Happy Morales tell of people traveling from across Texas to visit Morales’ convenience store in Laredo. According to Jimmy Credible a lifelong resident of Laredo, the tourists came from far and wide to see if they could enter the store without Happy telling them “Hello.” “It never worked” said Jimmy, “Happy would get them every time, just as soon as they come in the door ol’ Happy would say in his steady as the sun coming up way “Hello, how are you?”
“That was always the way with Happy, you just could not find a single day that he would miss saying Hello and not a single person on the face of the earth that he would miss saying it to if they came in his store.”
Some years ago a new legend of Happy Morales began when it was reported that he had said “Hello” to every single person at the Laredo County Fair on a busy Saturday.
“Well that’s what some folks was a sayin for a while”, said Helen Cooper, “But I’m not right sure that’s true. Still I would believe that stuff because that was just the way Happy was, he would say ‘Hello’ just as pleasantly as a sunny morning all the time and say it to everyone, especially if you was to walk into his little store.”
Juanita Jones Minton said Happy would also vary the way he said ‘Hello’ just to break things up and give variety to his style. “Sometimes when I went in his store he would say “Heeeeellooooo,” you know really drawing it out like a melody, and other times he would make it more of a question, like “Hello?”
“That used to crack me up, the way he could keep you guessing that way” said Ms. Minton.

According to family members Morales will forever be known in Laredo as the man that said “Hello” with charm, wit and purpose. “We know God has opened up the gates of heaven for Juan” said his sister Felicia, “And ol Juan probably walked right in there and said to St. Peter, “Hellloooo, how are you!” Felicia said thoughts like that would sustain her over the next days of missing Juan, the man that always said ‘Hello’.



Felicia Morales and her son Herbert (above) reminisce about Juan, the man widely known for always saying "Hello".