Wednesday, July 05, 2006

All That Glitters Is Not Gold

Do any of the rest of you have to do Continuing Education Credits for your profession?

The Architectural Board in Texas demands that I become increasingly smarter, as if it were actually possible.

GAAAAHHHH !! Government and bureaucratic BS brings out my sour side! I mean continuing ed courses that I read for credits are usually just ignorant. It feels like a freshmen class. Deja Vu at State U.

Or as Yogi Berra once said, “It’s Déjà vu all over again.”

However I ran across some stuff on color yesterday that was half-way interesting. It’s still disarmingly simple, but in a happily simple way. I am giving you some of the lowlights below. Give yourself a ½ CE Credit in architecture when finished. My flippant comments are in maaaroooon.

Color Memories and Emotion:

Often our relationships with colors are based on our memories of colors. We remember pleasant experiences, pleasant people and pleasant surroundings. These colors make us feel those same pleasant emotions. In contrast the color of vomit can make you sick.

Color Associations:

We often relate to colors because of their associations. We think of gold as a rich luxurious color because it is the color of a precious metal. Apply that color to another object and the association is transferred to the object to some degree. Men should paint their penises gold?

Color as Therapy:

Blue – Promotes physical and mental relaxation, inner security and confidence; used to stimulate healing, relieve pain and lower blood pressure.

Yellow – Bright, happy and stimulating; improves memory, judgment and the capacity for decision making. And you thought Grant was attracted to yellow women because of their cute booties….

Orange – Frees emotions, promotes self-esteem and the capacity to forgive. Men should wear orange shirts when girlfriend/wife or both are angry. Fights depression and cultivates good humor.

Effects of Lighter and Darker Colors:

A small home appears larger with the use of light coordinated colors of similar values. Light colors can, however, make crowded houses look even more so and can make large houses appear too luminous. Paint your little house white if you want it to appear larger. Put white shingles on it if you want it to look really really big. Put a white fence around it and we’re talking castle.

A large home appears less bulky and less imposing when dark contrasting colors are used. If you are ashamed of your big house, paint it dark gray. If you are very proud of your very big house; paint that mother white!

Yes, I actually took a Continuing Ed test on this stuff. and it went on like this for 72 pages!

Like I said, GAAAHHHH !!


Jenn said...

At least you can entertain yourself with a running mental commentary...right?

We have to do stuff like that at work...but it's usually about compliance and privacy. DULLSVILLE!!!

What if I paint my house in stripes? What does that mean?

Seven said...

It means you are left handed ditzy beautiful babe with lovely thighs.
Remember that a wide house should avoid horizontal stripes.

Ilias- said...

Blub blub blub. Words. Colors and words are not the same. I will just leave it at that... you can forward my thoughts to the Achitectural Board in Texas if you like - you have my permission.

Grant said...

My dentist has more of a golden skin tone, which must be why she's so hot - she's made of a soft, expensive metal that conducts electricity.

patti_cake said...

I am still laughing about the gold penises

Seven said...

I would expect nothing less than such a comment from my artist friends, and exactly my frustration with so much of continuing education nonsense. For example, this particulat color masterpiece was written by a tech rep with Sherwin Williams Paints????

All that glitters is not gold. However, testing IS required.

Imagining being filled with riches are ya?

Rick said...

Wow, instant flashback to an idiotic class I took as a journalism major. "Color and balance" or some equally inane title. I sat through three hours of "red is warm, blue is cool" before I decided I had better uses for my time (involving pipes and papers and such). Aced the midterm and the final (the only two required assignments) without studying or going to class, and got a "D" for poor attendance (not listed as a requirement). Not at all sure what it had to do with journalism.

Seven said...

White Guy,
And I'm confident the colors were better post pipes and papers anyway?

patti_cake said...

Oooh now that was bad ... good one Seven! Very good! :)

Angie said...

gold penises? would that be soft gold like 14K or hard gold like 10K? A girl needs to know these things.

Seven said...

Penises differ. I think you need some experience. Drive on down to Dallas sweetie.

Seven said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Seven said...

You should know too that some men experiencing difficulty have resorted to the use of Viagold.

Leesa said...

So what about red?? ;)

Seven said...

Red = Warm, sensuous and loving, like the Montana sunrise on a beautiful day for photos.

Angie said...

Ooooo, getting in the car now!!!!


Lynilu said...

gold penises. very intriguing. I hope that when i'm ready for dating again, I find some spunky old fart willing to be creative!

Seven said...

Don't settle. Shoot for the young guys...well at least legal.

Lynilu said...

LOL! You are about the 20th person to tell me to look for younger men in the past few months. OK, I'm thinking it over!

Anonymous said...

i like indigo. its pretty.

light green looks terrible on me. clashes with my yellow skin.