Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Corrected Phrases

I am feeling a little lazy today so here is some stolen political correctness material. Come to think of it you may like the stolen material better than my original stuff. Try not to get used to it.


For the Men

1. She is not a BABE or CHICK - She is a a BREASTED CITIZEN.

2. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.

3. She is not BLONDE - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

4. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

5. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.

For the Women
1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID STORAGE FACILITY.

2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

3. He does not GET LOST - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.

4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

5. He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He is GENERATIONALLY INCLUSIVE.

2 comments:

Stacy The Peanut Queen said...

"Overly caucasian"? I LOVED that one (that one is SO me instead of my husband!!!)

And I must admit, The Peanut King has been accused of #5 (although does 14 years REALLY make that much of a difference???).

:)

Seven said...

In the case of humans probably not.
However in the case of dogs it works out to 14x7=98 years difference which is stretching it a little.
I think gender issues are at play here too. I'm 54, but if I married a 68 year old women I guarantee tongues would wag!